It was the morning after the storm. A young girl walked along the beach where thousands of starfish had washed ashore.
As she walked, she bent to pick up each starfish she passed and gently tossed it back into the ocean.
People watched with strange curiosity. Eventually, a man approached and said:
“Little girl, why are you doing this? Look at all these starfish! You can’t possibly save them all. You can’t make a difference.”
The girl picked up another starfish, gently tossed it into the sea, and replied:
“I made a difference for that one.”
The man paused. Then he moved to help. Others followed. Together, they saved them all.
4 lessons from a starfish
This story – The Star Thrower – is part of a 16-page essay by Loren Eiseley. The version you read above is an adaptation that’s been used in charity campaigns for decades.
I first heard it as an adult. And it stuck with me, not just because it’s warm and feel-good (though it is), but because it captures something essential about how change actually happens.
It’s easy to talk about making a difference. It’s harder to act when the problem feels too big. And harder still when the impact feels too small.
But you don’t have to do everything. You just have to do something. That’s where real leadership begins. Here’s the takeaways I’ve found most useful.
1. Start where you are
From a distance, the beach looks hopeless. Too many starfish. Too little time.
But the girl isn’t trying to solve the whole problem at once, she’s focused on what’s in front of her.
I think about that a lot when working with founders, teams, and creatives. There’s always the temptation to zoom out: “How do we scale this? How do we reach everyone? How do we build something big enough?”
But big things start small. Whether you’re building a product, launching a campaign, or trying to shift a team’s culture – impact begins with one decision.
And it’s not until you act, that people notice.
2. Influence doesn’t always have to be loud
The girl in the story doesn’t lecture. She doesn’t plead for others to help. She just acts. And that simple act changes everything.
Leadership is about visibility. When people see someone doing the right thing – especially when it’s hard or thankless – it gives them permission to do it too.
That’s what I try to create in the work I do: a space where action feels possible. Where the first step isn’t perfect, but it’s powerful.
When I teach communication, I care far more about focus and courage than polish. Because nothing can start until someone goes first.
2. Stop waiting for perfection
The man in the story makes a mistake a lot of us make: if we can’t do it all, we freeze. We wait for a better time, a bigger plan, the perfect moment.
But perfection is a luxury. Progress is what counts.
We see this in startups all the time. Founders holding back from launching, because the website isn’t ready. Teams delaying decisions, waiting for perfect data. People sitting on brilliant ideas because they can’t articulate them “just right.”
I’m as guilty of this as anyone. And now I yearn for the time lost waiting instead of doing the thing I know needs doing.
The starfish doesn’t need a five-year plan. It needs a hand. And that can start today.
3. Small acts can change a system
Yes, the story is a metaphor for individual action. But it also hints at something bigger, how small acts can spark bigger change.
The girl doesn’t just save a few starfish. She inspires others. And that collective effort changes the outcome for everyone.
That’s how I think about impact. You start small. Human. Local. You learn from it. You scale what works. You build a system that prevents starfish from washing up in the first place.
But to do this, you don’t start with the system. You start with the starfish.
What starfish are you ignoring?
This story stays with me because it’s a reminder. Every day, we’re surrounded by small chances to act. To lead. To make a difference. And most of the time, they feel too small to matter.
But that’s the trap.
The email you could send. The person you could mentor. The moment you could speak up. The idea you’ve been sitting on. These might not “scale” right away, but they matter. And more than that, they set something in motion.
We don’t need more superheroes. The Marvel Cinematic universe was more than enough. What we need is more people willing to start. To show up. To throw one starfish back and trust that someone else will see it, and do the same.
That’s how change works. That’s how culture shifts. That’s how movements begin. Not with a bang, but with a quiet, deliberate gesture of care.
So, I know I’ve got some things to do.
And what will you pick up today?
